cristian's wordpad & lingering thoughts

dose of Cristianism & other absurdities.

Posts from the “love lost” Category

syrup pt 1

Posted on October 21, 2020

what do you feel, when you apply the sentience? besides wall pinning. and drizzling fire sessions momentary silence, pin drop in an empty room padded wall. effervescent, and sensual feeling your feminine voice telegraph vibrations through many a noise millenias not enough time to fix things we destroyed i feel violated. pass me the void barely observant. just an impressionable boy unpacking post traumatical memory noise your electrical currents, blend into words ready to work, to have me possessed, like your serveant invested, alluring. the rest is concerning subway network connecting my brain muscle memory. where her head would lay tapping longing lust in this mental frame karma sucks & its seems that way cause i feel she turns the other cheek when i…

super conservative (the poets descent into the ‘convenience’ of a sudden rejection)

Posted on October 17, 2020

if…I get to the point where no ones’ love embroiders me,I’d mix the oils, clay, and color coordinate the sordid seamsavoid distaste. annointed is the day shes holding mehoist your rose colored lies on a crown of thorny leaveshearing voices, and allof them enjoy to screamtend to open wounds, forget the ointment and gauzenirvanas intensely consoling. and im pointing to Godfor answers. for pensive motions, for something to wantmemorized medusas feet, & my neck is at oddsalleged moments, you put me through in the darkmemory wash, collective dullness, deafness and sobtook years to look at you in the eye, and your tear ductsthe only thing set to stone was the mountain between usconsider the fact, were considering redactingwhats upsetting to me, isnt your lack…

bondage (our chains, are invisible, but trust me, they’re there.)

Posted on May 4, 2020

inept, and upset, it’s like nothing is mentioned.lifes a run on sentence, interconnecting.eclectic, electric, im a plug in the wall.a bit so perplexive. spotting the occult in the psalms.the rejection. a song in the hall of this crazy asylumstraitjacket is off, and i still feel like i’mbindedabstaining. no hiding. not restrained or assignedwhat’s a goon to a goblin, what’s 12 noon to this bondage?loudspeakers.shouts weaken as i interrupt the connection.been seasons since I slept at the suns’ dusky consentgrayscale cuts. as lovely as everIt’s only fear if we love to project iti’ve learned to accept it, in a functional senseinflections infecting, so fucking intenseinflux of attention. but none to respectfound you by looking at your pendant glow in the dark on your neckdefunct. so…

july 19th (3)

Posted on August 7, 2019

he’s unsorted. unabashed. formal with his emotions. unashamed. vulnerable worn as a sash on thunderous days. sport a badge of honor stained with the blood of cain. what’s her name? love lost. lust loves to come in gangs. my father never asked if i’m ok. he told me he forgave me for what we brang. brought. sorry. when i’m in pain, my language crosses barriers all the same. rain forest. brain blots. lost in my badge of honor. should i say, i’m sorry? i’m not to blame. fuck that motherfucker fuck that motherfucker fuck it. flames. distraught and caught in daze. there’s days i question, am i supposed to be gone? hoping to holy father that i’m totally wrong. rotary dial. noticeable drama. rusty…


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